Experiments in Style: Gimme the blues

An alternative rendering of a rather mundane story

Writing blues songs is quite fun, and in terms of constraints a blues song is almost a form of Oulipo in itself. (The Oulipo is a French writing movement that experiments with using constraints of various kinds, and experiments with styles.) The usual format of a blues song is:

Line 1, rhyme A

Line 2, same as line 1

Line 3, rhyme A

The form also often contains the following elements:

• Things happen at midnight, especially leaving on trains

• The protagonist wakes up in the morning and thinks or says something, or something happens

• There is often a hint of sexuality (in the story below, what exactly were the doctor’s “potions”?)

• A doctor is often involved, usually to cure love sickness or similar

• Professionals are sometimes referred to in a strange way; for instance, in the story below, the doctor is referred to as a “medicine woman”

• The grammar is not something the average English teacher is likely to approve of; in particular, there are frequently double, or even triple, negatives.

I’m not entirely satisfied with the story which follows, not least because it is incomplete. However, it’s interesting because the limitations of the form force you into being succinct, and making your point quickly.

As an example of the benefits of this, when I was teaching Economics ‘A’ Level I knew that students found it hard to remember the two main competing theories about monetary economics. So I summarised the two theories as blues songs¹. When I tested the students around 6 months later, they remembered the theories perfectly.

Another outcome of reframing a story using the tropes and other aspects normally associated with a different genre (what in science fiction especially would be known as ‘megatext’) is that it fictionalises what was a true account. In the version below, for example, a ‘medicine woman’ gave me her potions. Nothing of the sort actually happened! But does that matter, given that the essence of the story is true?

But right now, here is the blues version of my “bang on the head” story. To save you having to leap about all over the place, here is the original ‘vanilla’ version, the template:

A bang on the head (template)

Baffled, by Terry Freedman

In the middle of the night, I woke up (if you can call being semi-conscious being awake), walked purposefully towards the door to go to the bathroom — and almost knocked myself out.

The reason was that in the twin states of entire darkness and semi-somnambulance I was facing in a different direction from the one I thought I was facing. As a result, instead of walking through the door, I tried to walk through the wall.

The next few days brought nausea and headaches. After much prevarication I went to Accident and Emergency, where I waited petrified among people for whom “social distancing” means not quite touching you, and who wore their masks as a chin-warmer.

An hour and a half later I emerged into the twilight, secure in the knowledge that I had nothing more serious than mild concussion. I failed to do much writing, but I was pleased to have read a further 17% of my book.

And now (fanfare), the blues version:

A bang on the head in the style of a blues song

Well I got up around midnight, bashed my head against the wall

I said I got up at midnight, bashed my head against the wall

Felt so bad, I almost had a fall.

When I woke up this morning, felt like I was dragging a ball and chain

Yeah, when I woke up this morning, felt like I was dragging a ball and chain

Head hurting so bad, thought I’d never be the same

My woman told me, boy you better get checked out

Well, my woman told me, boy you better get checked out

You might have cracked your skull when you gave yourself a clout

Went to the medicine woman, to ask her for a cure

Well I done saw the medicine woman, and asked her for a cure

She used her magic potions, now nothing hurts no more

That’s it from me for now, except:

A couple of shout-outs

I like to spread the love so to speak, here are a ‘stacks you might enjoy

1. Here they are:

Savings Blues

By Johnny Keynes and the Marginals

You know I woke up this morning, and saw that my income's way too low

I said woke up this morning, and saw that my income's way too low

I said to my woman, I ain't gonna save nothin' no more

My woman told me, she thinks that stashing my cash is wrong

Yeah my woman done told me, that stashin' my cash is wrong

She don't seem to understand that I might wanna buy me some bonds.

One of these days, gonna get myself a well-paid job

Yes I got a feeling, I'm gonna get myself a well-paid job

When that day comes, gonna stop being a no-savings slob.

Savings Blues

By Irving Fischer and the Classicals

You know I woke up this morning, and saw that interest rates are low

I said woke up this morning, and saw that that interest rates are low

I said to my woman, I ain't gonna save nothin' no more

My woman told me, I oughtta stop spending my cash

Yes my woman told me, I gotta stop spending my cash

I told her interest rates are low, so ain't no point in buildin' up a stash

One of these days, interest rates are gonna rise again

Yes I got a feeling, that interest rates are gonna rise again

When that day comes, my days of spending are gonna end